The Bar

No, I didn't go out drinking. I couldn't even recommend a good bar to visit for that. I'm talking about the bar we set when we are prioritizing the standards of our life. Deep, huh?
My mother and I have often had the conversation about expectation vs. disappointment. And I believe this directly correlates to our own personal "bars." For example, let's look at birthdays. As a kid, I got really, really excited about them. I would countdown for weeks until that wonderful morning that I would wake up and be a new age. Especially ten. Ten is the year you go from a single digit to a double digit. It's a huge deal. It's an unmatchable deal. Let's face it, unless we live to be a hundred, it'll never be as big as this again. Anyway, the birthday arrives and it's all about fun, when you're a kid, at least. Your friends are all excited for you, there's typically cake, ice cream, a party, maybe...gifts...the whole shebang. But let's talk about, oh, 27. What the heck happens when you turn 27? I'll tell you. Not a thing. I did not even see a cake that day. Not at 28, either, until I specifically remember dragging a warped Duncan Hines box out of my pantry and making one myself. Sure, we could say this is because we're getting older, birthdays are for kids, blah blah blah. Really, though, it's because our expectations themselves have become more realistic, and disappointment has replaced excitement more than a few times.
My good friend wrote about the hype leading up to midnight on New Year's Eve. Same deal. We make a big fuss, and for what? Unless you're one of the lucky few that got proposed to on this eve, or you're standing on Times Square partying with Ryan Seacrest, I'm doubting there's anything monumental about this holiday - ever.
Here's a touchy one, ladies. Look at your significant other. If you have one. Is he who you really thought you'd end up with? Are you head over heels in love, never once looking back or questioning what the heck you were thinking? Did you know it all along, or did you grow into it? Does he "raise the bar" for you, or lower it? What about with your job? Is it your dream? I mean, really? You certainly don't have to tell anyone the answer in your head. My point is, all throughout life, we are faced with our own personal standards. Our own "bar." The decisions we make do tend to indicate our own lowering or raising of our standards...
I'm truly not even trying to be depressing...I hope we've all made decisions that have made us better people. I know I have, several times. But then there have been times that I've dropped my "bar" altogether. And I guess that's okay, too, because isn't life one big learning curve in itself? Really, though, should we just get rid of the bar? What do standards become if we are constantly disappointed with results? What are we doing to ourselves when we make resolutions to, say, lose a bunch of weight and then on the second week of our diets we fail to go on that 30 minute walk, or we eat a giant piece of chocolate cake? (P.S., if you know where I could find a good piece of chocolate cake, I'd like to chat...otherwise I have to locate the aforementioned box of Duncan Hines in my pantry again and make my own magic). Here's my opinion: we have to re-vamp our standards in order to even call them "our standards," pretty much on a regular basis. Because I think it's all a part of growing older, and the whole "hindsight is 20/20" thing. I think we have to look at what we've done, and evaluate it after the fact. Act now, tweak later? Sort of. Act now on the little stuff...don't think about it too much. But add up the little stuff and use the pros and cons as a guideline for the big stuff. What are your thoughts?